So then, whatever you desire that others would do to and for you, even so do also to and for them.
Jesus taught we should do unto others as we’d have them do unto us. If we’d take this principle and put it into practice, then we’d experience more joy in marriage. Most of us get up everyday hoping somebody else will make us happy, rather than looking for ways we can make someone else happy. Jesus teaches our joy is found in giving our life away. When we try on our own, to make our life good, we thwart God’s power. I believe firmly that what you make happen for someone else God will make happen for you —even if you’re married to a first-class jerk. If you live your life trying to be a blessing to others, God will bring you joy—if not from your spouse, from other relationships. Or he’ll impart it to you himself. A lot of people say, “I’m in this marriage and I believe God wants me to stick it out. But I’m miserable.” Yet I believe that if God asks us to do something, he gives us the grace to do it. So if God is asking a person to stay in a difficult marriage, he’s not asking them to stay and be miserable. He’ll give that person what they need to make it.
from the Marriage Partnership Magazine article titled, The Secret of Contentment
Many spouses complain about being neglected in marriage. Sometimes their harts grow hard and they refuse to do anything special for their spouse any more. If this is you, I would like to challenge you to take your hard heart to the Lord. Sow goodness into your spouse’s life and your harvest will be sweet.